Honesty is really important when it comes to relationships. We are now talking about being faithful and being able, to tell the truth all the time without white lies.
The idea of radical honesty is that you get in front of your partner and tell everything you are bothered with so that you can create building blocks of your relationship and increase the intimacy by killing every misunderstanding.
As radical honesty coach Jakob Eichhorn says, the primary goal is to transform suffering into freedom and connection by telling the truth. This particular idea requires you to tell the truth even if the other person does not want to hear it.
It means that you have to say how you feel, especially when you believe that avoiding this conversation could make you hide your feelings and become frustrating as a result.
We are talking about the commitment of authenticity that will require you to be yourself as much as possible.
How Long You Should Pretend To Be Someone Else
In case you lack a sense of self-worth, you will start censoring yourself and try to express yourself in terms that will be desirable and acceptable to someone else. For short-term relationships, you will be successful in reaching your goals.
However, if we are realistic, how long you can pretend to be someone you are not? The idea is to be with someone that will love you as you are without censorship and being someone else.
Of course, it is vital to be a strategist, especially when it comes to dating, but it is not that great to be fuzzy and warm so that you can manipulate the other side to reach the committed relationship.
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The worst thing that you can do is to build the foundation of the trusting relationship based on the manipulation.
The idea is to share the longing and sadness that you are embarrassed to admit so that you can discover the sense of yourself and provide you whole perspective as you imagined it.
It is useless to neglect your vulnerability and to show only substantial parts of yourself. Most people are avoiding the idea of showing their soft sides because they feature the tendency of abandoning themselves due to projection and illusions of others.
The idea is not to hide your weakness but to avoid the idea that people will be pushed away from your act of trying to protect your real self.
Give Up Control
Radical honesty requires an essential attitude shift, and that means that you should give up the idea that you can easily control anyone other than your reactions. The more intelligent people are, the more challenging it will be to reduce control.
They enter the worst trap possible such as that they can think about it long enough and try hard enough to figure someone out. You would have more difficulty with this particular idea if you learned how to change or predict the behavior of your parents after some action.
This is a survival skill, and when we combine that with emotional insecurity that is the main reason why people grow up while spending too much energy to control things.
The main reason for the control is not the evil desire to manipulate so that you can gain power, but this particular mechanism is designed to help you see the world as a safer place.
However, that is an illusion, because people think that they can say something and that will guarantee that everything will be perfect. Searching for the right words and right emotions can drive you crazy.
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It is much simpler to speak the truth without attachments to reactions that you will receive. Do not let the resentment get more significant than your power to deal with it. Therefore, you should handle issues one at a time and as soon as they happen.
At the same time, do not try to manipulate and control your partner’s actions and feelings. You should share your fears, wishes, dreams, and hopes and be honest with yourself so that you can be honest in a relationship. It is as simple as that.